This Is Not About You

July 10, 2018

Some years back, I attended my 20-year high school class reunion. My husband and I agreed when we got married that we did not have to attend each other’s class reunions. So, I was solo. But in this case, it was good. These classmates were people I grew up with. Going solo gave me a chance to ask questions and listen. Innocent questions like, How is your dad doing? Do you like being back home? What are your career goals? How are you and the kids doing after the divorce?

And I listened. Even though I had not seen many of these people for 20 years, there was still a connection because of a common background. I knew their siblings. I heard about their struggles from my mom talking to their mom a few years back. Stories poured out: struggles, fears, victories, losses, hopes. Real, heartfelt things. Things they may not have even shared with their spouses!

Before I want to the reunion, I asked myself, more than a few times, why I was going. But as I listened to my classmates, it dawned on me why I was there. I was there to bear witness – a witness being someone who has knowledge of something by recollection and experience or shows that something exists or is true. I was not there to get my needs met. I was there to meet the needs of others, simply to hear them and to acknowledge their experiences. It was humbling.   

God taught me a great lesson that weekend. He taught me the value of being present. When God moves me to go somewhere or do something, I used to always want to know why? What is the reason? Why is this necessary? Am I prepared to do that? Why me? But those questions are small thinking and self-centered. Maybe it isn’t always about me? Maybe He just needs me to show up and care about people enough to listen instead of doing all the talking. Maybe He just needs me to hug someone and say something encouraging. God is very big and He knows who needs what and when. Instead of always asking why, my response could be “Okay, I’ll go.”

Also, I heard the voice of the Lord, saying, Whom shall I send, and who will go for us? Then said I, Here I am send me. Isaiah 6:8